Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Movies That Suck Mean Girls

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Movies That Suck is a feature where I watch a bad movie and share my reactions to it in real time. Sort of like live tweeting without the tweeting. I watch it so you don't have to! This will be spoilery I guess by definition, but since you probably won't want to watch these anyway it probably won't matter? But heads up anyways. So get comfortable, grab a favorite beverage, and let me tell you about a movie that sucks. 

This week is Mean Girls - which I have never seen. Really. My first time. And I'm told it's good! So yeah... let's check this baby out. Oh and thanks to Shannon at It Starts At Midnight for the recommendation of this one.   

So Cady (Lindsay Lohan) has been homeschooled and raised by her zoologist parents in Africa, but now they've settled in Illinois and Cady is going to high school! Lucky her. After almost getting hit by a bus on her first day, she proceeds to stumble her way through her first class, which includes crashing into her teacher Ms. Norbury (Tina Fey- yay). Having spilled her coffee all over herself, Ms. Norbury proceeds to remove her sweater, flashing her bra to the class as she does so. She seems pretty chill about it though, and now we meet the principal Mr. Duvall (Tim Meadows). Um, does he have a thing for Ms. Norbury? 

She soon makes friends with Janis and Damian, who proceed to fill her in on the cool girls- the Plastics. Seriously? Queen bee Regina (Rachel McAdams) and her pals Gretchen and Karen. Man it's so weird seeing Lindsay Lohan and Amanda Seyfried so young in this one! I kinda like Janis already. She helpfully points out the various cliques, including the "sexually active band geeks" which cracked me up. Ooh Cady of course meets the Plastics forthwith, and they are pretty shallow. Especially Karen who wants to know why Cady is white if she's from Africa??? 

Cady has a cru-ush *singsong*. Aaron in her math class. But shit he's Regina's ex! That's gonna be a problem. But she is totally hanging with the cool kids, they even go to the mall where *gasp* Gretchen sees a guy she likes with another girl. Regina fixes that problem by calling the girl's mom and telling her that her Planned Parenthood results are in. "She's not going out with anyone," proclaims Regina. Wow. And Amy Poehler's in this?? As a "cool" mom lol. Love it. 



Ooh there's a "burn book" where the Plastics rip on everyone. Janis is a dyke apparently according to the book *rolls eyes*. Janis wants her to steal it, and meanwhile Cady is crushing hard on Aaron. He invites her to his Halloween party, and I had to laugh at the "slut rule." Anyways... to no one's surprise Regina kisses Aaron and tells him all these lies about Cady, so that didn't go well. Cady decides to declare war, at Janis' urging. Ooh this should be good. 

Oh my gosh the talent show- stop. Jingle Bell Rock? The look on Cady's parents' faces as she gyrates up there with her new "friends"- awesome. You know this movie does have its moments. Okay the plan is back on after Gretchen breaks down and spills some of Regina's secrets to Cady. And they manage to break up Regina and Aaron! Or Cady does after telling Aaron that Regina has been cheating. I kinda like how Cady is sorta becoming a bad girl here, playing the game? Oh and did Amy Poehler just ask Regina and the guy she's making out with if they need a condom? 

So Regina is gaining weight now thanks to the Swedish "weight loss" bars Cady hooked her up with. And I love the four way phone convos (although that would be texting now) where they lie to each other- Cady is doing a bang- up job sabotaging the Plastics. She is now the queen bee! Is she as bad as them? Janis tells her off and oh shit- Regina discovers what the "weight loss" bars really do. It's war. She gives the burn book to principal Duvall and then spreads copies of the pages all over the school. Fun! 



So it's a brawl. School- wide. Pretty entertaining actually And then they have an assembly, where Ms. Norbury shames them all into understanding that they should be in this thing together, not sniping at each other all through high school. Aww...  although it is a good message, obviously. And everyone apologizes to each other in a scene that would never really happen, but at least Janis gets her dig in on Regina. I wonder how much of that would be different if the movie were made today, considering the changes in attitude towards LGBT rights in the last decade? Would the fact that Janis is gay even be an issue? Anyone in high school wanna weight in? 

But wait! Oh my gosh did Regina JUST GET HIT BY A BUS? *sputter* what... is she dead? She's gotta be, cause splat! But... she's not??? And Cades is worried about going to school the next day because everyone hates her- umm why would there even BE school the day after THAT shit? I mean a brawl and a bus killing queen bee. Or not killing... does she even feel bad??? Okay she fesses up to smearing Ms. Norbury as a drug dealer, and they're all good... as long as she joins Mathletes. She gets to miss Spring Fling too, the big dance. 

But- they win the math competition and make it to Spring Fling anyway! Time to rock this thing and make it right, and Cady does after winning Spring Fling queen. And ooh we get the obligatory updates on where everyone went. Let's see- Regina joins lacrosse and is a boss, Karen uses her, um, talents to announce weather, and Gretchen has a new clique- the cool Asians! Aaron goes to Northwestern and is seeing Cady- awww- and there are Junior Plastics now! A new clique hath arisen! And they're promptly taken out by bus. Just kidding. 

Bonus points for the credits song, a cover of Dancing With Myself by Billy Idol, done by The Donnas. Enjoy. 


48 comments:

  1. Ha ha! I actually like this movie and all of its cheesiness

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  2. For me, I think the high point would be Billy Idol. I think I'll pass on the movie though.

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  3. Ah one of my favorite bad movies. Love this feature. And the buss thin classic. Lol

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  4. Oh what?! This is a new classic! Me and my friends can quote this film word for word. Lol.

    Sorry you didn't like it.

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    1. It is one of those films- SO quotable. and I did like it actually!

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  5. Oh now you've got me wanting to watch this movie again. Rachel McAdams was such a great "mean girl", and as I recall, this was like the breakout role for her.

    ~Mogsy @ BiblioSanctum

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    1. Right? So watchable. And I agree she was awesome, especially in that Planned Parenthood scene...

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  6. I'm not sure how many times I've watched this movie, I remember my kiddos watching it whenever it was on. I do remember having a good laugh about Regina and the protein bars, it is pretty cheesy, but funny.

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    1. It is funny, and I laughed at the protein bars too :)

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  7. Despite it's craziness, I've seen this about 4 times, so I'm thrilled that you got to laugh along with the rest of us. (lol) Hugs...RO

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    1. It was funny and I'm so glad I watched it.

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  8. Oh my god... I've always hated this book. So many of my high school friends were obsessed with it and quote it ALL the time. It drove me crazy!

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    1. Ha some movies are like that. :) It wasn't QUITE as funny as I thought it might but I did laugh a few times...

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  9. I love this movie for all it's awfulness. I laugh so hard every time I watch it. Glad you got to have a kick out of it too. Too many great comedians to let it pass unwatched!

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    1. Exactly, Tina Fey and Poehler=priceless.

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  10. I love this movie, it's just hilarious and ridiculous!

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    1. It did make me laugh a few times! I was shocked by the bus scene!!

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  11. Glad you enjoyed this one! I watched it in high school but haven't watched it since, maybe I should watch it again and see what I think of it now.

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  12. I have not seen this movie yet! I've seen scenes from it - maybe 5-10 minute increments and it was baaaad so I'm not sure I could handle the whole thing or it might be better in context??

    Karen @ For What It's Worth

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    1. I think it's better in context! You should check it out and let me know what you think. I had never seen it either...

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  13. I would rather do pretty much anything than watch this film! It is exactly the kind of thing I avoid in books!

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  14. This is one of those movies that I remember loving when it first came out way back when, but now I feel meh towards it. My humor tastes have started to change.

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    1. My humor tastes have changed too, and stuff that cracked me up in high school is not quite as funny now :)

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  15. I did see it when I was younger and enjoyed it

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  16. I saw this back in the day and I don’t remember anything except the bus scene which was epically funny.

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  17. I love this movie so much. I was straight up picturing all the scenes as I read this, too funny- I loved during the talent show when Amy Poehler is actually mimicking the moves, I love how much of a loser she is hah. And Tim Meadows losing his shit when the brawl breaks out is hands down one of the best moments. Did you love Damien!? Because Damien is THE BEST. I think I am actually shocked at how few people like this movie in the comments too! Cause I mean, ultimately the message is really positive even if it is super cheesy- i mean, it is supposed to be hokey and a satire, of course! I am glad that you at least somewhat liked it though, and I wasn't torturing you haha :D

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    1. Yes!! I love Damien! "And none for Gretchen Weiners. Bye."

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  18. I absolutely love this movie and am so sad that it was viewed for this post! It is hysterical and has remained one of my fave movies since I first watched it many moons ago. "Oh my God Danny DeVito, I love your work!" Damien is the best.

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  19. That's crazy you had never seen Mean Girls! I feel like I have the DVD somewhere, but it's been a long time since I've seen it. It's such a fun movie though, haha. Like Shannon said, it's one of those movies that's supposed to be cheesy and really doesn't take itself too seriously but still has a nice message in the end!

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  20. I remember enjoying this movie when I watched it, but I haven't seen it since. XD Thanks for the song!

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  21. I still haven't watched this one and now I feel like I should hop on the bus with y'all! I think that it is because I have been afraid of the fromage factor. I will definitely give it a try when I need a good laugh. :)

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  22. I don't think I've ever actually watched this... Don't think I'm going to either, lol. This was better. :)

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  23. OMG for the first time?! lol I just love this movie. SO hilarious. I find myself quoting it all the time.

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  24. I haven't seen this one either but it does sound fun! I wasn't aware so many people got hit by buses in it! Also seeing Rachel McAdams play this kind role sounds really entertaining.

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  25. Your 'Movies that Suck' posts always make me smile :-)

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  26. Hahahaha. Yeah, I do think this movie had its moments. I've read a couple YAs that have borrowed this exact plot....
    Jen Ryland Reviews

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  27. I wasn't a fan of this movie at all.

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  28. This is awesome and now I want to rewatch the movie while reading your post at the same time, lol.

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  29. Mean Girl is one of those terrible films you can't help but enjoy. It's crazy and ridiculous but so damn fun along the way. It's what I like to watch when I'm in a bad mood.

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  30. This was such a fun review - I love your series. I like Mean Girls, it's one of those films I always rewatch when I need a film to make me laugh and feel better.

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  31. Oh my god, I love Mean Girls. On Wednesdays, we wear pink.

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  32. Better late than never ;) Glad this was a fun watch for you Greg!

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  33. Now I need to go watch this one again. I agree it didn't suck. :-)

    Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

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