This Is Not A Test

This was a harrowing book. It's about a zombie apocalypse, told from the perspective of a suicidal girl- a girl whose sister ran away to escape their abusive father, and broke Sloane's heart in the process. Their father hits them all the time, and Sloane and her sister were saving money secretly to run away, but at some point Lily just left. So now Sloane takes the brunt of the abuse, to the point where she has to stay home from school to give the bruises time to fade, when all of a sudden it happens. I liked how we actually see the beginning of the apocalypse- I mean there are people running down the street, others being chased, cars running into poles. It literally has just begun.

Sloane takes off and soon hooks up with a group of survivors, and they make for the community center only to find it already overrun. Along the way things happen and not all of them make it. We don't actually see this, we get it through the conversations of the kids. Something bad happened and now there is a lack of trust, as some members of the group blame the leader Cary for what happened. Cary by the way is sort of a leader by default, he's the one who gets them safely to the high school, where they set up barricades and are temporarily safe. The group dynamics are a big part of the story- everyone wants to survive except Sloane, and the narrative POV we get her wanting to die juxtaposed with everyone else's survival instincts.

A lot of the story takes place in the high school, which surprised me a bit, I thought they would move on and this would be a tale of running for your life, but it's more a look at how wanting to live and wanting to die- in an apocalypse no less- can get mixed up. Sloane just wants to end it but will that jeopardize her companions? I should say too that this could be triggering for someone who has wrestled with suicide- there is a lot of talk about it and even a supporting character who takes that route. I don't want to be spoilery but feel it's worth mentioning.

As I  said above this is a harrowing tale. Summers takes no prisoners with this one- it's dark and while not overly gory it does have a few moments. Not everything goes according to plan and some of the characters do questionable things, which feels realistic because when one has to make split second decisions in a zombie apocalypse, who knows what one might do? Decisions lead to death at times and this is one of those books where it pays not to get too attached to anyone! I thought Cary was a complex character, Rhys could have used a bit more and Sloane was likable even as she struggled with her sister and her feelings about that. I did get a wee bit tired of the constant angst and darkness but at the same time I think the author is clearly going for an examination of Sloane and who she is- the zombies are just a backdrop.

The ending is interesting- not a cliffhanger but not a happy ever after necessarily either. This story could go on, and while I don't see a sequel other than a novella that continues the story, I would absolutely read more about these characters. This is an edge of your seat thrill ride that gives one lots to think about- if you want a deep look at how a zombie apocalypse affects a tormented young girl who is suicidal, that's what this provides, but if you just want some zombie action this has that covered too.